Rebirth

Well the show went well on Monday. The Right to Answers showed everyone that hardwork and a good drummer do pay off. Unfortunately it is my last show with said band. Noah and I have officially split off and formed our new group. The new group is Ellipsis. Here, for you now, I will explain the secrets behind this band name.
An ellipsis is a break in writing, signifying a period of time. Basically it's those 3 little dots at the end of a sentance that a lot of people like to over use...
We named the band this because: it sounds cool; there are 3 members in the band; and because of it's duality. Contained in the name is also the word ellipse- an ellipse is a geometrical term for a not so perfect circle, otherwise known as an oval. I don't feel like explaining the point behind the ovals just yet, so maybe later.
From the ashes of one band will rise a great new band.
Find out what it's all about... October 1, 2007.
-CDB.

Forgotten?

I think not!
No, I did not forget about this blog. I have intentionally been putting this post off (I like to keep it interesting with as many events as possible). Anyways- once again I find myself writing about how much of a total cunt Alex is. Sorry Jessica, it's a terrible word- but it is the only thing that a number of people can seem to use to describe him and his behaviour. The show is coming up, and so is my heart attack! Bump after bump in the road to this show are keeping me and Vanessa on our feet. Apparently finding a band with a drum kit in Victoria is a difficult task... bunch of cheap, lazy, idiot-babies. So, Alex blew up at Vanessa for some very stupid reasons, then- being Alex, decided to try power tripping on her and firing her from her own promotions company. He never learns. He says to me "We won't be doing shows through her anymore after this." Ever have one of those moments where you secretly laugh to yourself and say "yea, you got that right?" well I had one of those moments. Alex sure will be surprised when after this show, both Noah and myself pick up our stuff and leave this piece of shit band. In the past few days Noah and I sat down and wrote songs for our new project. Not only do we have way more depth in our lyrics, but we have way more structure to our songs. In comparison to what Noah and I write- TRTA stuff isn't considered "song" status. Alas, reading break is ending. I do not want to go back to the old routine of classes, homework and Sarah. All that girl does is complain about everything. I was amazed (yet not surprised) that in response to my text message to her the other day, I recieved a reply full of bitching about her homework, home and life in general. But I must say, I have to thank Sarah- if it werent for her, and a girl by the name of Amy who Noah is associated with, the lyrics to our new song would not be possible.
Whoever reads this will surely have to come see Noah and I in concert when we find a drummer and write a few more songs, so that you can hear the powerfull music that angry feelings towards whiney bitches can yield.
Peace out,
-CDB.

Work in Progress

Well I have ended my stay in the Valley. The realization that my father's birthday is an unlucky day for the past two years has prompted me to take huge caution next year, for fear that I may die. I set out on my way back to Victoria, and before I knew it, some idiot from Grand Prarie in a 2006 Dodge truck completely crushed the living fuck out of the front end of the family's Luxury Buick Lesabre.... once again, I was not pleased. Last year on Feb. 11 as posted in my previous entry, a bunch of terrible stuff happened. And this year seems to be no different.
However, I have semi-excellent news!
Yesterday was my appointment with Emily. She is my hero of the week for her mad artistic skills! So far it has taken two hours and $260 to get the tattoo where it is now. I estimate it will take about 40 minutes more to finish the colouring of the center eye. Unfortunately I have to wait for what is done to heal, so I must wait till Feb. 27 for completion.
Anyways, the picture doesnt do it justice, believe me....although the picture still kicks ass... go figure.
Consider this phase one of the process of prying open my third eye.
-CDB.

And Now for Something Completely Different!

Ladies and Gentlemen I give you: Gershwin, the bunny!
He randomly appeared two snowfalls ago; we have since taken him into our home. There is some sort of strange fuzzy cuteness about him that can't be explained.... aside from he is a bunny.
Bunny's make everything good.
-CDB.

V-Day Cometh

Well... St.Valentine's Day is closing in upon us now. Four days from now will mark the one year anniversary of the vacation to Arizona which consisted of: Dad ripping the ass end of the family motorhome off; all of my textbooks and paintball gear and leather jacket w/passport getting stolen; and Erin and I splitting up. As you can tell, I don't exactly welcome this time of year with wide open arms. I deffinately don't portray the perfect vision of a Mr. Smiley Glad-hands. Valentine's Day is nothing more than a commercial holiday to boost chocolate shop revenues. Girls get it nice, all the free candy and flowers.... but then of course they complain about it making them fat- oops. Good thing I don't buy stuff for people on V-Day! Don't get me wrong, I'm not cheap or anything- but no girl worth my time seems to ever be around and interested in being my Valentine. I especially love how Valentine's day is a day of love, when in actual fact St.Valentine was stoned to death by an angry mob. I bet he is rolling in his holy grave after seeing how people use the anniversary of his death.
All of this reflecting on past V-Day experiences and general views and opinions about it (coupled with some conversation with Jessica) has prompted me to make pose this question:
Why do all the nice people seem to get walked all over by people who claim to care about them? Think about it, people use each other all the time under the false guise of a 'relationship'. As far as my past is concerned all I have to say is:Fuck smiley glad-hands with hidden agendas. Fuck these disfunctional, insecure actresses.
So I thought I would leave you with some more lyrics, which I have chosen to interperate as talking about Lust/Love in general... personifying it of course.

Rev 22:20

Don't be aroused by my confession
Unless you don't give a good goddamn about redemption
I know, Christ is coming
And so am I.
You would too if this sexy devil caught your eye
She'll suck you dry.
And so you'll cry to be back in her bosom,
To do it again.
She'll make you weep, and moan and cry
to be back in her bosom,
To do it again.

Pray
Shall I go blind?
Pray
'Cause nobody ever survives
Prayin' to stay in your arms just until I can die a little longer
Saviors and saints
Devils and demons alike
She'll eat you alive.

Jesus has risen
it's no surprise
even he would martyr his mama to ride to hell between those thighs
(who wouldn't)
The pressure is building
at the base of my spine
If I gotta sin to see her again
then I'm gonna lie and lie and lie.
She'll make you cry
I'll sell my soul to be back in your bosom
Gladly, now please suck me dry.
And still you cry to be back in her bosom
To do it again.

Pray
Shall I go blind?
Pray
'Cause nobody ever survives
Praying to stay in her arms just until I can die a little longer
Saviors and Saints
Devils and Demons alike
She'll eat you alive.

My pulse has been rising
My temples are pounding
The pressure is so overwhelming and building
So steady and heavy
I'm ready to blow
What is she
What is she
What is she waiting for?!

Pray
pray till I go blind
Pray
Because no one ever survives
Praying to stay in her arms just to die a little longer
Saviors and saints
Devils and demons alike
She'll eat you alive....

'Puscifer' (MJK.)

Well that is all for now. Happy go fuck yourselves day to all those lovey-dovey dipshits!
-CDB

In the back

As if I had spoken too soon, it would appear the dagger has fallen and struck me square in the spine. Robbie has informed the band that he doesn't have the time in his life to devote to the band. He has agreed to play the February 26th show, but he is gone after that. There are talks amongst Noah and myself that perhaps we too will break away from the band when Robbie leaves. I am beginning to accept what everyone tells me. It would seem that people either respect what I do, or just want to try to play to my vanity- but I can no longer count how many times I have been told that my skills surpass the current band. It seems that every day that goes by someone who hears Noah and myself play tell us that we need to abdicate far from this band that is "dragged down by Alex and Shane." February is going to bring some very intresting bumps for me it would seem. I go to the Valley for February 10th and 11th for my fathers 61st. They will for the first time see the pisces mark on my forearm. Little do they know that I am scheduled to get a big, expensive, left shoulder piece on February 12th. Then, this all coupled with the show and then the parting of ways with Robbie. I don't claim to be a psychic, but the forseeable future is looking bleak for now. But what if I approach it as a sort of rebirth? Maybe I can use this as a chance to recognize my 'holy gift' and step through this shadow of my soon to be former self? No matter what happens I will not quit! I have people who support me, and I am proud to have them around me.
Some poetry for you all:

A groan of tedium escapes me
Startling, fearfull
Is this a test?
It has to be, otherwise I can't go on.
Draining patience, claimed vitality
This paranoid, paralyzed vampire act's a little old.
But I'm still right here giving blood, keeping faith
And I'm still right here.

Wait it out. Gonna wait it out. Be patient.

If there were no rewards to reap
No loving embrace to see me through this tedius path I have chosen here
I certainly would have walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.

If there were no desire to heal.
The damaged and broken met along
This tedius path I've chosen here
I certainly would have walked away by now.

Be patient
I must keep reminding myself of this.
-"The Patient"- Maynard James Keenan.

Well. That is all for now. Peace. Out.
-CDB